Every night I am asked by Riley if I will lay with him. Some nights I just want to wind down by myself and I feel selfish. He tosses and turns, obsessively rubbing his feet up and down my shins. He is so busy and restless while chasing sleep. I hate myself for becoming irritated by these nightly rituals. Most nights I am thankful for this time because I realize how fleeting it is. He grows in his sleep physically and mentally. He corrects his pronunciation of words that I soon miss and long to hear again. Sometimes he shuns my affections in front of others showing me how independent he is becoming. I know you have to give your children roots it's giving them the wings that is so damn hard. So tonight I just let the present wash over me. He wraps his arms around my neck and says "I love you mommy"; I could see his eye lids get heavy and his limbs let go of the fear of missing out on what happens when he falls asleep. There is a sense of peace that washes over us and I know how precious and irreplaceable these moments are.
