Turkish Apricots

My morning ritual

Consists of 

Two turkish apricots

And enough black

Coffee to chase

Last night's insomnia

Away

The full moon

Brings

Fever to my skin

And my mind

Is as restless

As the wind

That uprooted

The weeping willow

In my backyard 

Longing to feel 

Content in my stillness

I meditate for peace

To wash over me

She never shows 

My bruises are fading

From violet to green

And I don't reach

For the whiskey

As often as I used to

Minute by minute

I breathe through 

Each day

Holding lightly and

Unfurling my fists

To watch the 

Crescent scars 

Disappear.

~Amber Comber 2016

Ether

I am not his 

He is not mine 

We connect in the ether 

Where 

Time and space 

Have no relevance 

Where

Moral compasses cease to exist

I tell myself to hold on ever so lightly 

For I will never be able to capture air...

~Amber Comber

Afar

I have fashioned this cage

That surrounds me

Rusted wrought iron

Spires that pierce 

The perfect blue sky

Everything looks beautiful 

From afar

When you can possess 

It without fear

How ugly we have become

Clutching to the past

And fervently trying

To control the outcome 

When staying is killing you

Slowly

But leaving is a shotgun to the

Head

No one wins in this cruel game

And no one is to blame

I burn inside while

Bruising outside

Wanting to peel 

Each

Layer

of 

Skin

Free.

~Amber Comber 2016

Shatter

How lost I have become 

In these woods of yours

You, the cowardly wolf

Howling silently 

At a Moon that

You will never 

Have the courage 

To be illuminated by

Ego bruised

Like my thighs

I tried to stay

So soft

For 

So long

But my veneer

Is ready to 

Shatter 

At your feet

Into a million

Sharp pieces

That your feeble

And bloody fingers

Will never 

Be able to piece

Back together again.

Amber Comber 2016

Promises

I promise to not open my heart

For every wounded soul 

I promise to not wear my headphones

Whilst walking the train tracks

I promise to get more sleep

I promise to eat better

I promise to take a break 

From the whiskey
When the bottles
Disappear faster than
I can pay for them.

I have been playing house
For years now
Loving everyone but myself
Becoming lonely and numb
To all that surrounds me
Soaking in long hot baths
To remove the pain and doubt
I still come out feeling
Unwashed and unworthy
One day I will remember

All the beauty

I have experienced 

And tears of happiness
Will pour from my eyes.

I have claw mark wounds
Flooding like rivers
Hemorrhaging from inside
When it comes to misery

I have the mind of an elephant 

I can never fucking let go
I know now that I have to
Before it consumes me
Even if I have to burn
It all to begin again.

Amber C. Smith 2016

Crescent? Burn and Destroy? Insert title here...

Soul of metal

Heart of stone

I howl 

Alone

Burn  

destroy x4

Trying to keep

Us sane

Far beyond

This fucking pain

Sacrifice and

No ones right

The sins

Have stained us all

Burn 

And 

Destroy x's 4

In the darkness 

Of the night

Where No one 

Can hear you fight

I will hold you

Still and tight

Quiet those demons

That claw from inside

The crescent moon

Pulls you in

Burn all you know 

To begin again x2

Unraveling

It's  astounding 

How quickly

One can unravel

As the world carries 

On all around them

Leaving a trail

Of blood 

Tears and

Self worth 

Behind you

That even 

The flowers

Have to weep 

As you walk by

And sacrifice

Themselves

To the concrete

Just to try 

To soften

Your step.

~Amber C. Smith 2015